![]() ![]() Do it oong enough and you’ll be where you want to be. Having WRITTEN to-do-list on our monthly objectives and review it everyday is crucial in reaching the end goal, we start doing small action daily toward completing the objectives. A lifetime goal could be broken down into “this decade goals”, and broken down again into “this year goals”, and again stripped into “monthly objectives”. Clearly defined goals takes a very important in making decision in our daily life, we could zig and zag for a while, but with clearly defined goals we would eventually get to where we want to go. The sad part is many people (including myself in the past) has been wandering on earth long enough without realizing the power we have in creating a lfe we want to live in, simply said, we don’t have goals. For people working in the office, avoiding challenge could mean staying in the same position without any promotion, or even getting fired! While challenging ourselves to get better, implement a genius ideas, bracing our fear of public speaking may get us ahead the promotion. The same goes with life, when we were kids, our parents gave us challenge according to our age, first to crawl, then walk, read, write, calculate, and as we grow up we choose the challenge more voluntarily. What you forgot is that you also got better in understanding the obstacles and how to get passed in the level. Think of it like playing a video games, once you win a level, you got to the next level, which look harder when you see it from your previous level. You could see a pattern emerged from my last two paragraph, that we are equipped with mental strength to cope with daily challenges, whether it is a challenge we voluntary choose or challenge we have to conquer to get ahead. Nobody want to be poorer or uglier next year, rational minded people would opt for richer and better looking. As a human, we strive to get better each day, or at least that’s the goal of rational minded people. Not because the new problem isn’t there at the beginning (although some work may be given to you by your Boss at a later time), but because we keep on looking for them to get ahead in life. Problems, we had it everyday, once we finished it, another rise. It works by compensating our weakness with our strenght. The most simple example is for a kid who lack in mathematic (and admit it) but excel in sports (and brag about it). Defence mechanism task is to protect our ego, preventing us from looking fragile and worthless. We use defence mechanism in our routine daily, it may happened when our friends confront us anger, sadness, and happiness. When angry, my friend may be shouting bad things directly to his partner while others may become passive-aggresive. That depends on their childhood memories, the environment they are living in, culture, and maturity. Now you know that we have a mental defence mechanism to adapt with the emotion and situation we are facing, but different people have different way to adapt. But again, it’s not normal to grieve for a year or longer (even six months is quite long already). Grieving for the death of people we love is a defence mechanism of our ego to fight the emotion we have, people do it for a month before getting back to their routine. It’s normal for people to feel down sometimes when we are facing difficulties in life, but being down for a prolonged period is not good for our psyche and health.
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